As many of you know, in addition to being a writer, I’m also a dancer. I danced from the age of three until I went to college. There I dabbled, very briefly, with a dance club and then I didn’t dance any more and I missed it. I missed it for a l-o-n-g time.
This was how I started…
While I was a good dancer, my body type wasn’t what was typical of the profession at the time.
I remember going to an audition for the local Nutcracker and wanting to die a thousand deaths. I STOOD OUT–and not in a good way. It was humiliating. That was BEFORE I even got to the dancing. That one incident stopped me from taking dance seriously in college: even though I loved it. I didn’t believe that I was good enough. Maybe I didn’t have to shoot for the stars–to try to be a professional. But I wonder where the journey would have taken me if I’d just minored in dance. I think I lost something by being afraid. I watch SYTYCD and witness the passionate dancers who break glass ceilings every season and it makes me a little sad that I NEVER took chances.
But what about writing? What was my excuse? Aren’t all body types welcome in that profession? Yes, but I was incapacitated by a different kind of exposure. I didn’t have a lot of confidence in who I was on the inside and writing was a great way to work through that until I realized that *gasp* other people would actually read what I’d written and get a birds eye view of what was on the inside of me. Do you see a pattern here? I kept writing–but I stopped writing from that deep place inside and when I did–the writing lost its magic. Without the magic…it also fell to the way side. Sadly, my soul spent a lot of time shriveling up and looking like a lint covered raisin that you might find in the cushions of a couch. Attractive, huh?
Lucky for me, this happened…
It shouldn’t seem lucky to have your father die of cancer and well, we all know that that wasn’t actually the lucky part. The up side to the biggest tragedy in my life was that my Dad gifted me with some extra courage before he left. RELATED BLOG POST.
After he died, I could no longer contain the truth. My truth. I began to write. I began to dance. I began to live.
Today I’ve written a YA novel called TOUCHING THE SURFACE. I’m looking for the right agent and I can picture my book on the shelves of bookstores and libraries. Book two the OPPOSITE OF GRAVITY is coming alive. I’m proud to say I have grown as a writer. Today I take dance classes. They challenge me, they inspire, they make me feel things. I also teach Combo classes to 3 and 4 year olds. They are the cherry on my sundae.
I’ve joined Workshop, where I’m ironically dancing with my target Young Adult audience LOL! They make me feel old, they make me feel wise, they make me feel welcome. Together we stretch…and isn’t that what its all really about anyway?
Subscribe via Email
