Tuesday I wrote a blog post called Working Like a Dog. Actually, I wrote TWO.

Just as I finished…the entire post (except for one dog picture) disappeared. I sucked in a huge breath, but quickly calmed myself, figuring I could < back-up a couple pages to the original post. Or at the very least, I’d get a little computer announcement exclaiming that an earlier version of my writing had been happily saved in cyber space.

Nope.

Nada.

Nothin’.

I wasn’t a happy camper.

At this point (I’ve got other stuff to do, people) so I thought about posting the dog picture with a very long and throaty growl underneath it and letting it be an interpretive piece.

But I’d liked the concept, so I decided to suck it up and plow forward, rewriting as best as a could from memory.

And then something weird happened. I wrote a BETTER post.

The topic was the same. It still had almost all the same points, but it was clearly better.

As I scratched the dog’s ears, I couldn’t help but ponder the situation and what I came up with was…

WE HATE TO KILL OUR DARLINGS!!!!

In the small expanse of time that it took to craft a relatively short blog post, I’d gotten attached and invested in how I’d already started to write my piece. (Even if it wasn’t doing exactly what I wanted it to do.) But, the minute I no longer had that original structure of words, it freed me up to take the more fleshed out concept and roll it out like like a hiker’s sleeping bag at the end of a long day.

I don’t recommend losing blog posts. It’s aids in the loss of tooth enamel as you grind in frustration. But maybe–just maybe–sometimes it isn’t such a bad thing to start at the top.

Lesson accepted.

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever lost on the computer and had to start over?

Tags: Blog Post, blogging, killing your darlings, Kim Sabatini, Kimberly Sabatini, Unhappy Camper

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Lately I’m having an unusually hard time coming up with blog posts. At first I thought my struggle was because I’m busy, both with life and writing. And I’m sure that plays a role, but after careful consideration, I don’t believe that’s the truest of answers. I think the most accurate reason for being stuck is that I have internet whiplash.

Unfortunately, blogging and social media have begun to seem a bit off. Kind of the way state testing and the common core feels uncomfortable. I’m not against some testing or having standards. In fact, I think they can be wonderful tools, but there’s something, not-quite-right about the current state of our educational system or the things going down on the internet lately.

For the first time, the trolls and the cyber bullies feel bigger than the things about social media that give me great pleasure. And then there is the sheer intensity of the opposing and highly volatile online opinions. I’m not suggesting that I only want to hear one side of an argument. I love intelligent conversation–I really do. But it is April of 2015 and already I can’t deal with the political FB stress. The hate mongering. How will I ever make it until November of 2016??? I refuse to comment, but can I also stop reading? I think I need to.

Of course, I’m smart enough to know the internet is the same functional and dysfunctional slice of pie you see in any microcosm. You should see some of the screaming, crying, throw-down dinners that have been had in my family over the years. I’m no stranger to the cray-cray, in fact I can bring the cray-cray just as much as anyone. But somehow the rapid, viral reach of the internet seems more sinister than I’d ever considered it before. When I fight with my family and friends, we make up and eat dessert and stuff. The world wide web doesn’t do that. Instead of stories I’ll laugh about at my kids’ weddings, there’s online shaming, which is probably as easy to catch as the stomach bug in a day care facility.

This is where the internet whiplash comes in. If you want to be heard, you MUST say something worth hearing. If you say anything worth listening to, there WILL be people who dislike what you’ve said. If you’re lucky those people simply disagree with you, but if you’re unlucky, it’s highly likely that they’ll abusively attack you online. My feelings about this state of affairs are whipping back and forth with such intensity it’s almost painful. One day I feel brave, the next cowardly. One minute I feel energized, but the next it’s depressing.

I’ve been trying very hard to find the remedy to my internet whiplash. I’ve been searching for a black and white truth that would clearly define how I move forward with my cyber life. As you might expect, that isn’t really working out for me.  Today’s blog post sums it all up perfectly–writing makes me see things clearer, all while mudding the same water quite a bit. So, there’s only one conclusion…what I need most is to be unsure. If I’m rigid, I will get injured. Instead, I need to be bendy. Perhaps it’s time to be flexible and blog when it feels organic and not blog when it doesn’t feel good. It’s a scary but liberating thought for someone who’s blogged regularly for years, but I should probably only blog when I have something important to say or share.

Is anyone else dealing with internet whiplash? What’s the worst part for you? What do you do to combat it? How do you feel about blogging at the moment?

Tags: Bullying, Internet, internet whiplash, Kim Sabatini, Kimberly Sabatini, online, trolls

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Well, it was another one of those awesome three day weekends, but you know what that means–my schedule went kaput. I realized I never did my Tuesday blog at 8:23am on Wednesday. *head thunk* And to add to the weird week posting confusion *SQUEE* I got a new laptop!!!! It’s so light and small compared to my old, but very loved 17 inch Macbook Pro. I can’t remember exactly how many years I’ve had it now, but they don’t even make that size anymore. I’ve been very reluctant to give up my faithful writing buddy, but unfortunately it was acting like an ornery senior citizen. The old dodger was slow and sort of constipated. Perhaps all the new and improved operating systems were bogging it it down. It wasn’t unusual for me to get up and do “other things” while I was waiting for things to load. Grrrr And since I write in a variety of places, carrying that thick and heavy dinosaur around was helping to keep my chiropractor in business.

Unfortunately, getting all my info to migrate from the old computer to the new one was a hair pulling experience in the beginning. Messing with a writer’s laptop is like dangling your kid over a cliff by one hand. *shakes, shivers and sweats* It’s just scary. EVERYTHING is on that device. And yes, I have multiple back ups, but I am not a technological guru, so it’s hard for me to feel confident when I feel I’m in a bit too deep. But with the help of my tech savvy hubby, we figured it out. *fist pump* And now I’m relaxed and in love. With the hubby and the laptop LOL!

And do you want to hear the really good news, above and beyond the speed of my brand, spanking new writing buddy? Even though the screen is two inches smaller–the font on everything is bigger and trust me–that is a fabulous thing. ((((hugs laptop))))

And because I love this new device as much, if not a little bit more than my boy’s cute, little, sleepy hamster…

I think I should actually name this laptop. Any suggestions?

Tags: blogging, computer, Hamsters, Kim Sabatini, Kimberly Sabatini, laptop, Macbook Pro, technology

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