Today it’s 9 years since my dad died. Every New Year’s Eve, after watching the ball drop, I sit down and write a post for him. This year I knew I wanted to include a certain song in the post, so I toyed for weeks with the idea of writing it down ahead of time. No matter what I did, I couldn’t quite make the words come together the way I wanted them to. I didn’t know exactly what I was supposed to say–until I went to the movies tonight and saw The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. It was amazing. And it brought it all together for me.
First the song…
It’s a Miracle by Barry Manilow
I keep this song on my run list and whenever it comes up I yell “Hey Daddy” at the top of my lungs and point to the sky. I’m embarrassingly loud but not really embarrassed at all. Of course, when I’m at the gym I give it up with a whisper, but he still gets a fist pump. It just feels right.
But why does this song remind me of him so much? Why does it pump me up every time I hear it? I think it’s because I’ve always thought of my Dad as having a secret life like Walter Mitty.
My dad was a gentle, complex and wonderful man who had all these crazy wants and dreams tucked away at his core, but he buried those wants and dreams because he didn’t know how to balance them with being a good husband or a good father. He was responsible and obligated. He just did his jobs. He led his life the best way he knew how. Sometimes he zoned out.
Just like Walter Mitty, my dad was a “ghost cat.”
(I won’t spoil it for you with an explanation of what that means–go see the movie.)
My world was a really good place because of all the choices my dad made and all the things he did for me, but I often wonder what he would have been like if he would have allowed himself more of the real life magic while he was here. But despite that, I’ve stopped thinking of him as having missed out. Now when I hear that song, I always get the strangest feeling he’s off having adventures and he doesn’t have to zone out to do it. I have an overwhelming sense he’s now joyful and he’s doing all the things he never did before. He’s going to the most amazing places. This is how I picture him when we’re running together.
When I hear that song, I know he HAS found his way home and I am always thankful that it’s still right next to me.
Happy 9th Anniversary Daddy. I heard you tonight…
“But the message here was plain to see Believe me…”
Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind ?
Nah!
Lots to learn and fondly remember about those days gone by.
BUT…
Let’s not dwell on it people. We’ve got a new year full of promise just waiting in the wings. So incredibly exciting. I love bringing new goals into focus.
Here’s some of the things I’m setting my sights on in 2014…
New Year’s Resolutions
*MOVING! I can not wait for this for a multitude of reasons. I’m super excited about our new home!!! I LOVE it and I’ll be sharing more of that with you as it happens. But I’m also stoked for the arrival of the day when I’m NOT MOVING ANYMORE! This process has officially eaten up most of 2013 and I’m ready to be done with it. Settled. Focusing on my other goals.
*Writing goals aplenty this year. I’m planning on selling book two, finishing book three and brainstorming book four. I’ve also got a little project that I’m dabbling with that I’d love to make more headway on. Getting all tingly for this writing year. NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) showed me what I’m made of and I can’t wait to broaden my own horizons.
*I want to keep running. Last month I logged 49 miles of running and today I should break that number for the month of Dec. I’m pretty excited to be running more regularly. By doing that, I’m seeing my running improve and if I can run like that after the holiday season of gluttony is over, perhaps there will be a little less of my in 2014 LOL!
*Back to Workshop in 2014. This is my dance class and it’s way more than dancing, although we do plenty of that. My Tuesday nights are the BEST and I can’t wait to get back to our regular routine. I love my Yanni girls. <3 But why this gets a resolution shout-out is that, for the moment, the inflammation in my hamstrings isn’t bothering me as much as it has the last year, so perhaps I can get some of that lost flexibility back. *crosses fingers*
*I talked about the move, but deep within the move, is the opportunity for me to do a wee bit of clutter purging. As every year kicks off, I always clean and organize, but I am REALLY trying my best to straighten up, fly right and take advantage of this opportunity. I’m sure I’ll be writing more about this in the future too. Such a personal struggle. I blame my father for passing down his unorganized genes. *points accusing finger skyward*
*And lastly, I want to continue my journey of doing things that scare and challenge me. I’ve found that I LOVE what’s on the other side of the hard things I’ve faced. I am a happier and better person for tackling my fears. The only regrets I have are for the things I’m still too afraid to do. So, in 2014 I’ll continue to challenge myself to be brave and we shall see how that’s working for me a year from now.
Your turn. Tell me what you’re focusing on in 2014.
If you’re a runner, you’re probably well aware of the debate about running while listening to music. In truth, I think there are good arguments on both sides of the line. Sometimes it’s good to be alone in my head while watching the world around me. If I’m not listening to other things, I can be paying attention to my body as runners and my thoughts. But since I tend to only run without music or an audiobook about 1 out of every 25 runs, I obviously have a preference. I find the pacing of music to be very helpful, it feels like an extension of dance for me. And at the end of the day, I find certain songs to be very motivating. They make me keep running on those occasions where my head gives up long before my body actually does. It’s a tool I use to dig deep.
One of my newer songs on my running playlist is…
And as I was running and listening to HALL OF FAME by The Script, I realized that one of the things I love about the lyrics is that it gives so many options for being a winner. Translation–whatever you’re going to do–be good at it. If it’s worthy of your time, give it ALL your effort.
On the walls of the hall of fame
Be students Be teachers Be politicians Be preachers
Be believers Be leaders Be astronauts Be champions Be truth seekers
Be students Be teachers Be politicians Be preachers
Be believers Be leaders Be astronauts Be champions
Standing in the hall of fame And the world’s gonna know your name Cause you burn with the brightest flame
My favorite “BE” is the one that always makes my feet fly a little faster…BE TRUTH SEEKERS. That’s what speaks to me. But whether your calling or your passion is “on” the Hall of Fame song list, YOU KNOW IT’S THERE. The purpose of this song is to remind you to BE SOMETHING.
Now tell me what Hall of Fame you’re standing in at the end of every day. What makes you burn with the brightest flame?
I LOVE it when I get the opportunity to write a FABULOUS Bookanistas review for a member of Michelle Wolfson’s Wolf Pack. I can’t begin to tell you how amazing it is to be one of Michelle’s pups. Not only are my pack sistahs sweet and fun people, but they are fabulous authors too. Ahwooooooooo…..
SPLIT SECOND — February 11, 2014
Life can change in a split second.
Addie hardly recognizes her life since her parents divorced. Her boyfriend used her. Her best friend betrayed her. She can’t believe this is the future she chose. On top of that, her ability is acting up. She’s always been able to Search the future when presented with a choice. Now she can manipulate and slow down time, too . . . but not without a price.
When Addie’s dad invites her to spend her winter break with him, she jumps at the chance to escape into the Norm world of Dallas, Texas. There she meets the handsome and achingly familiar Trevor. He’s a virtual stranger to her, so why does her heart do a funny flip every time she sees him? But after witnessing secrets that were supposed to stay hidden, Trevor quickly seems more suspicious of Addie than interested in her. And she has an inexplicable desire to change that.
Meanwhile, her best friend, Laila, has a secret of her own: she can restore Addie’s memories . . . once she learns how. But there are powerful people who don’t want to see this happen. Desperate, Laila tries to manipulate Connor, a brooding bad boy from school—but he seems to be the only boy in the Compound immune to her charms. And the only one who can help her.
As Addie and Laila frantically attempt to retrieve the lost memories, Addie must piece together a world she thought she knew before she loses the love she nearly forgot . . . and a future that could change everything.
Kasie West did everything right! SPLIT SECOND is a fabulous and worthy follow-up to her first book. I really loved PIVOT POINT for it’s thoughtful and exciting creativity. I get really pumped about a well executed book with a great premise–especially if it has characters that really work. I love books that make me think long after I’ve closed the cover. Without a doubt, PIVOT POINT delivered everything I wanted in a debut novel, but not all second books know the secret to taking characters and plot to the next level.
Kasie West has it all figured out. SPLIT SECOND gave me all of the things I loved about PIVOT POINT, but didn’t rest on the familiar. She expanded the plot, extrapolated on earlier characters, brought in new ones and gave me Connor to swoon over. (In my humble opinion, that boy stole the show and I want more of him and Laila ASAP!) Additionally, I was also really impressed with the twists and turns involving Duke. I like my characters a little messy. And then West’s world building makes me want to crawl into her head to see what’s really going on in there. I love the way she thinks. I’m hoping that someone makes a TV series out of PIVOT POINT/SPLIT SECOND so I can see everything come to life on the screen.
While I hated flipping to the last page, at the end of SPLIT SECOND, West left me blissfully satisfied while still wanting more. *sigh* I can’t wait to read what she writes next. If you haven’t read PIVOT POINT, don’t waste a split second because SPLIT SECOND is almost here and it’s a must read!
You can find out more about Kasie West and SPLIT SECOND here…
I love to write–too much. It’s a sickness really. My debut novel, PIVOT POINT, is out now with HarperTeen. (And will be followed by its sequel, Split Second on February 11, 2014.)
THE DISTANCE BETWEEN US, my contemporary YA novel, was published July 2, 2013 (HarperTeen).
My agent is the talented, funny, and sometimes crazy, Michelle Wolfson.
Looking for more amazing BOOKANISTAS REVIEWS? Don’t worry, I’ve got them right here…
Yesterday I overheard two women talking in the locker room at the gym. They were chatting about holiday preparations. One would tell the other something they were doing to get ready for the holidays and then the other would reciprocate. The thing I found the most interesting during my sweaty, eaves-dropping was that both women were telling the other how they wish they could do what the other one was doing. (On a side note–I was pretty in awe of both of their ambitious holiday plans.) There were sighs of longing involved–mine and theirs.
But it got me thinking. They both were proficient, talented in completely different areas. And my first thought was that they should both be proud of what they can do. Gosh–both of them were better prepared for the holidays than I am. But the truth is, there are people out there who think I have my holiday preparation shit together. They envy me! (FYI–I love those people) So, still pumped up on my running high I decided I should be proud. We all should be proud. Too often we focus on what we can’t do. We fixate on our weaknesses. We lack appreciation for the things we excel at. Life is hard enough some days. Why do we do that to ourselves?
And because my mind works like snow in the wind–drifting into ever changing patterns–I came to another realization as I watched the ladies chatter.
We are pieces of a whole.
Our strength is that we are the sum of our differences, not the accumulation of our sameness.
We can’t all be good at the same things, but we can all be good at something. And hell, if we work together, we can probably get ALL THE STUFF DONE.
And then, because I left my water bottle in the car (I’m a forgetful creature) and was dying of thirst, I decided further enlightenment would have to wait. But that’s okay, because today I decided I might not be half bad at disseminating random nuggets of wildly caught wisdom. And I make killer chocolate chip cookies for the holiday–when I get around to doing it. Whatever. I rock!
What piece of awesome are you bringing to the whole? Don’t tell me what you can’t do. I want to hear what you’ve got to offer the world today.
