I went skiing with the family this weekend and was talking to one of the instructors who was working with my oldest son. We were discussing how the eleven-year-old talked me into going down my first blue trail. *head thunk* I’ve only skied 3x’s so far so this was stretching my comfort zone quite a bit. I mentioned how I was a little bit nervous scared out of my gourd, going down that steep, slippery slope. The eleven-year-old talked about how freaking great it was, but also admitted to taking a tumble at the end. Although he did go down a bit after and with a touch more finesse than I, I was proud to announce that I HAD NOT FALLEN AT ALL!!! Much to my chagrin, the instructor looked at me and then congratulated the eleven-year-old for taking a tumble.
“If you’re not falling–then you’re not trying hard enough.” He said.
Damn–I hate it when my kids and their ski instructors are right.
Too often I operate in protection mode–afraid of getting hurt. I’m aware that this is not always a bad thing. There are occasions when jumping head-long, unprepared into an adventure is a recipe for disaster. But sometimes it’s just a quiet way of being scared. Let’s face it–there are some moments when it’s exhilarating to race forward. If you never try, you never have the wind in your hair. (This is metaphorical because yes, I had my helmet on–safety girl.) But this is not just a lesson for the slopes. It’s how I should view my writing life (picture moments with paralyzing fear-of-failure while working on book #2) and even who I choose to be on a daily basis.
I’m never going to ski the black diamond slopes the first time out of the gate or the equivalent of that. This is not a failure of internal fortitude, it’s common sense and it will keep me alive. And I like it that way. But… I have those moments where I’m coasting along, happy and comfortable. Yet there’s a niggling feeling in the back of my mind that says–you should be, could be doing more–a hint that there are bigger and better things waiting for me if I take a chance. My instinct has always been to say–but I might fall! I CONSTANTLY have to remind myself that nothing good can ever happen if I live my life watching from the sidelines or taking only small risks while sheathed in bubble wrap. Writing a novel was a risk. I fell A LOT but guess what–I got up. Falling didn’t make me a failure–it also didn’t make me an author. But moving forward did and the thing to keep in mind is that you can’t follow your dreams if you’re sitting on your ass watching the world go by.
Just remember that when you’re chasing your dreams…if you’re not falling–then you’re not trying hard enough.
What’s the biggest fear that holds you back from chasing your dreams. What helps you get back up when you take a spill? Any good mantras that I need in my repertoire?
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