I went skiing with the family this weekend and was talking to one of the instructors who was working with my oldest son. We were discussing how the eleven-year-old talked me into going down my first blue trail. *head thunk* I’ve only skied 3x’s so far so this was stretching my comfort zone quite a bit. I mentioned how I was a little bit nervous scared out of my gourd, going down that steep, slippery slope. The eleven-year-old talked about how freaking great it was, but also admitted to taking a tumble at the end. Although he did go down a bit after and with a touch more finesse than I, I was proud to announce that I HAD NOT FALLEN AT ALL!!! Much to my chagrin, the instructor looked at me and then congratulated the eleven-year-old for taking a tumble.
“If you’re not falling–then you’re not trying hard enough.” He said.
Damn–I hate it when my kids and their ski instructors are right.
Too often I operate in protection mode–afraid of getting hurt. I’m aware that this is not always a bad thing. There are occasions when jumping head-long, unprepared into an adventure is a recipe for disaster. But sometimes it’s just a quiet way of being scared. Let’s face it–there are some moments when it’s exhilarating to race forward. If you never try, you never have the wind in your hair. (This is metaphorical because yes, I had my helmet on–safety girl.) But this is not just a lesson for the slopes. It’s how I should view my writing life (picture moments with paralyzing fear-of-failure while working on book #2) and even who I choose to be on a daily basis.
I’m never going to ski the black diamond slopes the first time out of the gate or the equivalent of that. This is not a failure of internal fortitude, it’s common sense and it will keep me alive. And I like it that way. But… I have those moments where I’m coasting along, happy and comfortable. Yet there’s a niggling feeling in the back of my mind that says–you should be, could be doing more–a hint that there are bigger and better things waiting for me if I take a chance. My instinct has always been to say–but I might fall! I CONSTANTLY have to remind myself that nothing good can ever happen if I live my life watching from the sidelines or taking only small risks while sheathed in bubble wrap. Writing a novel was a risk. I fell A LOT but guess what–I got up. Falling didn’t make me a failure–it also didn’t make me an author. But moving forward did and the thing to keep in mind is that you can’t follow your dreams if you’re sitting on your ass watching the world go by.
Just remember that when you’re chasing your dreams…if you’re not falling–then you’re not trying hard enough.
What’s the biggest fear that holds you back from chasing your dreams. What helps you get back up when you take a spill? Any good mantras that I need in my repertoire?
My work in progress is never far from my mind, even on the days when I don’t get to sit down and officially put the words to paper. *like yesterday…grrrrrr* But I try not to get frustrated because just like Stephen King–I have my “boys in the basement”– hard at work when I’m doing other things. I love those “boys” because they’re always working, listening, dreaming, imagining, wondering, deciding, cutting, searching and discovering what’s inside of me–even when Im sleeping. There is a price to keep them happy–they’re hungry little guys–and must be fed a diet of creative and stimulating things–like music and dance. This was the very first song on THE OPPOSITE OF GRAVITY playlist and I can remember loving the fact that it showed up on the SYTYCD show. I was blown away by the performance–the movement–the expressions. The dance story isn’t a perfect match for the story in my head, but there’s something about the heart and soul of it that resonates with me and what I’m writing…
Plus…I’m really missing So You Think You Can Dance right now. *sighs and taps foot*
What about you? Anxiously awaiting SYTYCD? I have a ton of “favorite” performances from the show, but I’m curious to know which ones you love best. Come on…spill.
I’m reading TOUCHING THE SURFACE to my three boys. Just a chapter a night. Now before you ask–my book is categorized as 14 and up and my kids are 11, 9 and almost 7. I’m not recommending SURFACE to kids under the age of 14, but my kids are in a unique circumstance. They have the author AND their mother in their bedroom at night, speaking directly to all their thoughts and questions. As always, I advocate that parents be actively involved in a book dialogue with their children. What is good for one child might be all wrong for another. Each kid is different and it is important that we know them as individuals. I know my three so I’m very comfortable. Here are some of my reasons for sharing my book with my boys.
First, they NEED to be a part of this. Their names are in the book–they LOVE that. It’s their laundry that’s been missed in the writing of this novel. It’s their mother who’s the crazy one with the voices in her head. And the thing is–they’re so insanely proud of me–it makes me want to lasso the moon and take it for a ride. They feel so special when they tell other people that they are reading it–I know because it comes back to me and it always makes my heart swell.
Second, I NEED them to be a part of this. I write with the same voice that I love them with. They are pretty familiar with my weird and wacky ways, my honesty, my assumption that children are continually under estimated. They KNOW me, so reading my writing is truly just understanding more of their mom. This book is some of the very best of me and I can’t imagine not sharing that with three of the most important people in my life.
Third, they are funny. It’s no secret–I have a potty mouth. The rule in our house is…you can say whatever you want when you have your own kids. Life isn’t fair and I don’t think it will hurt them to figure that out with the little things in life. They need to watch their language. Even though they’re used to me needing to be *bleeped* they seem to find it endlessly amusing when I swear while reading my book. The 9 year old actually asked me to re-read a section because he was “confused about who was speaking” only to have the almost 7 year old rat him out for wanting me to read the swear word over again. ROTFL! We had a long discussion about the authenticity of teen characters. We used their older cousins to prove the point. Now the almost 7 year old tells everyone… “yes, my mother uses curses in her book but it’s there to make the characters realistic.” My author-mama heart explodes with pride every time I hear him say that.
Fourth, they surprise me. My 11 year old interrupted our chapter one night to ask me a question about the afterlife. I proceeded to go off on a tangent where I told him how I really didn’t know what was out there etc… His reply was… “Sheesh, I finally have the author right here in my room and I still can’t get an answer. You wrote the book–you’re supposed to know everything about it!” I smacked my head like it was a V-8 commercial. He didn’t mean the “real afterlife” just the one in my book. And I know this sounds silly, but I realized that I don’t have my mind completely wrapped around the idea that people are going to be really focused on my book–that I’m the one, the only one, who can really answer those questions. The thought of it gives me shivers.
Fifth, they satisfy me. As I’m reading–they’re responding. And they are doing it in all the right places. They get mad at me for leaving them hanging at the end of a chapter. They strongly dislike certain people and they have soft spots for others. Even more important–their reactions to the characters are changing–just the way I had hoped they would. The boys ask interesting questions–smart questions and that makes me proud of them and the book. And the cutest? I’ve actually caught them “fighting” over who would get to be who if they were playing TOUCHING THE SURFACE. I know–how cool is that???
I promise to let you know what they think of it when they’re done. How do you feel about the books that kids are reading? Should be reading? Shouldn’t be reading? How did your choice of reading material impact you when you were a kid?
*TOUCHING THE SURFACE has a new release date–October 30th!!!! I know that means that I’m making you wait a little bit longer, but it also means that I get to launch my book during my favorite time of year. I can’t help but be excited–only eight months to go!!!
*Guess what’s available for pre-order??? Yup–TOUCHING THE SURFACE is on Amazon. I can’t even begin to tell you how cool this is. *does a little twirly dance* Feel free to stop over and hit the like button for the hardcover and for the Kindle ebook or…you can even pre-order it now. OMG!!!! I can’t believe I’m finally getting to say that.
*Want to learn some funky facts? You can now find out more about me and TOUCHING THE SURFACE on the Simon & Schuster website. Kimberly Sabatini-Author Revealed. You can even sign up for email updates.
Lauren Oliver, Kimberly Sabatini, Kate Ellison *squee*
Linda Hanlon got a picture too. And yes, Lauren is really that tall and doesn’t Kate wears really cool tights?
Woot!!! Got to share Class of 2k12 swag and my ARC of TOUCHING THE SURFACE with some new friends and my buddy April from Good Books and Good Wine.
So, have you pre-ordered any highly anticipated books off of your wish list lately? I have to confess, I just pre-ordered all the Class of 2k12 books that are currently available. I wish that would make them come faster!!! I also pre-ordered IN A FIX by my Wolf Pack sistah Linda Grimes!!!! I can’t wait to read them all!!!!
I’ll admit it–as I was packing my boys lunches this morning I did an oh, crap! I forgot to write my blog post. Sorry. So, as I was packing, slicing and spreading I realized that I’d found the perfect connection for the blog. CRUST!
Lets face the truth. Unless you’re eating crusty, rustic bread–no one likes the crust. On plain old store bought loaves, the crust is not the best part of a sandwich. And that is why I cut it off of my kids lunches. I know that if I do– they’ll eat more and faster–getting in all the good stuff I pack in the sack. But because I was late with my blog post, due to getting caught up in writing my WIP (completely great excuse for being tardy, right?) I realized that one of the reasons that I’m so motivated to get this draft on paper, is so that I can cut the crust. Yup, when you revise, you take a story and you make it easy for the reader to ingest and you highlight the very best parts. You can cut it up into fun shapes, package it in unique ways, add sides and so on. Revision is just fun.
But you can’t cut the crust until you finish the sandwich. Technically, I guess you could cut the crust off the bread and then make the sandwich but I’ve got to warn you–the edges aren’t as clean. The peanut butter and jelly drips out. It’s just not as pretty to look at. But that’s just my opinion.
Lunches are packed and I’d better get this post up so I can can get back to that WIP. I’m thinking that later, I just might eat a sandwich while I’m working on it. What’s you’re favorite sandwich? Crust on? Crust off?
